Club-Admiralty

v6.2.1 - moving along, a point increase at a time

Sev TNG: Captain Obvious?

This just reminds me of the "Captain Obvious" Hotels.com commercials :-)(original archive here)
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Sev TNG: Red Alert

I somehow think that this is not what Reed had in mind ;-)(original archive here)
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Sev TNG: choose a door, any door.

Back in the day this seemed funny (just for the sake of being funny).  I think these days (especially with what's been happening in the world) it seems like a good episode of trek in the making... (you know, the whole exploring social and political issues of the day through the lens of scifi)(original archive here)
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Sev TNG: Where are the toilets on this ship

The joke works only as a double-entendre (probably doesn't translate well either). I think my two favorite alteranates are: " Does it matter? These uniforms have no zippers." and " You heard me back at Starbase 5: "Does anybody need to go? I'm not stopping once we go to warp..."" (original archive here)
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Sev TNG: space cats!

It's funny, but I had never thought of Spot's gender on the series. The alternate punchline that I would prefer is: THAT cat was a stunt double. (original archive here)
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Sev TNG: Parting gift for the Borg

I do wonder what Wesley would have done for the borg, given his 'traveler' abilities and all. This alternate actually made me laugh: I locked him in a closet with Barf and a dribble! (original archive here)
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Sev TNG: no sound in space

Well...not that bad. I guess in space no one can hear you scream either :p I did like this alternate though "I don't know, but Industrial Light and Magic gets $18,000 every time it happens!!!"(original archive here)
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Sev TNG: Picard the ladies-man

Hmmm... this would seem better if delivered by a Vulcan.  Of course, it could have been after the mind-meld with Sarek...so ...potentially explainable.  One of the alternates was a little better in my opinion " At least Tryhard's still here! Mine are all either transferred, dead, or whisked off with Q!" (original archive here)
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Sev TNG: Free cable

I guess it should be free satellite, not free cable.  I prefer the alternates of "Sure beats the pajamas that Star Fleet makes YOU wear!" and "After a few Millennia, you tend to run out of fashion ideas. . ." (original archive here)
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Sev TNG: Measly is going to the Academy

I guess this one is for those who didn't like Wesley Crusher.  The alternative punchlines were all very mean-spirited toward Wesley, but this one was the one that I liked the best from all of them, and it feels a little more comic-strip-like: Sev Fleet's Insurance Company won't insure the Enterprize while you're on board. (original archive here)
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Sev TNG: Jazz humor...or not

This one didn't really resonate with me these days. Yes, it makes sense for Riker - given his interest in Jazz, but I think the alternate submission of " We could use it as a hood ornament for the Enterprize" was a little better.(original archive here)
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Sev TNG: I mean, have you looked at the other guy?

It's hard to believe, but I guess life imitates art. A couple of weeks ago the Democratic Party in the US unveiled their new slogan: I mean, have you seen the other guys?  (link to TheHill.com). I guess someone's got to make the Federation look good with all those badmirals running around :p (original archive here)
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Sev TNG: disfunctional tractor beams

Not really sure how to interpret this one.   Wondering what I thought when I originally read this.(original archive here)
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Sev TNG: the French captain

Hmmm... Should Picard be drinking tea?  Or, since there is synthahol why not some good Bordeaux? ;-) (original archive here)
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Sev TNG: IBM compatibility

Oh the 90s... when everything was IBM compatible (well, PCs before Windows took over were touted as being IBM compatible, which I guess was DOS compatible).  I do wonder what today's equivalent would be.  What OS would data run?(original archive here)
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Sev TNG: Klingons always annoyed

A bit sophomoric humor about a Klingon's resting angry face...(original archive here)
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Sev Trek: The X Generation

With the end of the original series trek,the Sev Trek crew moved onto the X Generation. Before I start re-posting from the archive, here is an introduction to the crew. 20 years ago when I first came across these I thought they were funny.  Some of them now seem quite sophomoric... 😐 . I guess some things don't get better with age 😜 Jet Lag Pinchhard As Captain of the Enterforaprize,
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