I had a moment of clarity today!
I have pinpointed why I am feeling extreme work dissatisfaction the last few months! If you had asked me:

"why do you feel dissatisfied at work?"

I might have said responded with something like

This bureaucracy is driving me nuts! It has been 4 months since I submitted upgrade paperwork, and 6 months since we've been talking about it, but Human Resources STILL have not received my paperwork. I have been going above and beyond the call for the last 9 months and I've also been getting heat from various people, including the higher ups, who believe that I am "not doing my job." Of course people don't see is that I am attempting to do my actual job while helping projects move along (things that aren't my job). Higher ups stress that projects, that are not actually in my job duties, are strategically important and either come out and state that I should be part of them, or hint at it. There are only so many hours in the day, and one must prioritize what needs to be done first, second, third and so on. When your bosses stress certain projects - well then you focus more on those, don't you?


Of course, the above is what is happening on the surface and is obvious to everyone involved. This however is not the underlying cause of my dissatisfaction and this I realized today! The real cause is this:

I hold myself to a standard, and I hold others to certain standards too! I do this subconsciously, I don't really think about it, and I think this is why it took me so long to realize what the underlying cause of my dissatisfaction is. Since I expect certain things of myself, I expect certain behavior from others, and because that expected behavior does not meet the actual real world behavior - there is a certain amount of confusion as to why things are not as expected, and there is exploration as to how you can make the actual match your expected. When you can't make the two meet (to a reasonable approximation) you get dissatisfaction - where I am now!

Here is a concrete example of this is: I like to fix things that are either broken or not functioning well.
A year ago, when I came to my current workplace, there were things that did not function well (or were broken!) that no one did anything about. Here are three (of many) examples:

1. Flash drives were not being recognized by our PCs. Up until that time someone from Systems needed to come out of the office, go to that PC that the patron was using and input the administrator password THREE times in order to make the PC recognize the removable media. When I brought the issue up it was dismissed as nothing could be done about it. Well I researched the matter, I found the culprit and fixed the problem!

2. PC user profiles were being corrupted. Again dismissed and people said "nothing you can do about it" - again researched and fixed the problem!

3. Servers were taken over by some pretty nasty software while the network manager was on vacation (mind you we don't have backup people) - fixed the problem myself

I was able to bring the actual state pretty close to my expectation levels.

Machines you can fix, people are another thing...

Here are four examples (out of many)

1. Person contacts me and says they want the newest version of software X because they will realize gains in productivity if we get it. We buy it, I install it for her, made sure it worked, went back to my office. 10 minutes later I get a call because she does not know how to use this software! I go, show her. A week later, the same situation. This repeated many times! (person makes $79,000)

2. Person calls me because they do not know if the patron is valid or not (i.e. if their membership has expired). This person deals with patrons every day and should already know how to check this sort of stuff - tools of the trade sort of situation. I go and show them. This situation repeats other times. (person makes $80,000)

3. Person calls about Microsoft Outlook problems. Its not my job to fix this, but I am a sport, so I go and help out and show them how to fix the problem. They forget how to fix the problem, so they call again...I fix it and show them again. This repeats quite a few times (person makes $75,000)

4. Someone moved their office and with them went the computer. I asked where they wanted to the computer and set it up where they told me (nothing special, just a CPU, monitor, mouse and keyboard). 15 minutes later I get a call that they want the PC moved 3 inches to the left and they cant move it. they needed my help...what? :-/ are you kidding me?! (person makes $90,000)

So it turns out that I can solve hardware problems, once and for all, but the human factor is always recurring - like the "lessons" I give them go in one ear and out the other. The actual appears not to be making it close to my expectations. This is because, I believe, they do not wish to learn. These are people that make quite a lot of money - some over $90,000 per year, and they don't want to learn basic things!

Now I do realize that the expected and the actual in these kinds of situations never actually meet, but they can come close enough to look at one another - I would be happy with that.

I also do realize that people have different technical backgrounds, and that not everyone has an appreciation for the geeky stuff I like. I am not asking for a lot - I am not asking you to program in C++ or create AJAX applications.

I am just asking that you know the tools of your trade. Know how your things work, and how to troubleshoot things that are vital to your livelihood. Also, when I show your something 10 times, I expect something to stick! This isn't too much to ask for, is it?

In Greek they say Μια φορά το λεν του ανθρώπου και δέκα του γαϊδάρου. Quite fitting for this situation. The positive side is that there are a number of people that do learn, and don't call back with the same problem, day after day, and they already know and are learning their tools of trade. Also, most of the people that I have to troubleshoot and instruct multiple times are appreciate and they say thank you. This is what keeps me just dissatisfied - otherwise I would be "completely dissatisfied"